LAKE CONWAY, USA – In a bold move for cancel culture that experts are calling “historically irrelevant,” a coalition of Gen Z activists took to social media this week in an attempt to cancel Dorf on Golf, the 1987 comedy short featuring Tim Conway as a vertically challenged golf enthusiast.
The campaign, launched via TikTok under the hashtag #DORFOFF has sparked confusion, mild curiosity, and one confirmed Google search.
“Dorf perpetuated harmful stereotypes of short people and highly unrealistic golf swing mechanics,” said 23-year-old activist Lacinta Chripplejay (they/them), who admitted she had never actually watched Dorf but ‘heard it was problematic somewhere’. They added, “We can’t let this kind of content go unchecked—even if it was released on VHS before most of us were born and is currently only available in a dusty bin at the back of a small town thrift store.”
The movement gained traction after a clip of Dorf on Golf resurfaced on a nostalgia account, prompting multiple Gen Z-ers to ask, “Who is this short-statured man, why is he yelling abuse at his clearly intellectually-disabled Caddy and objectifying his sexually suggestive assistant?” The answer, it turns out, is complicated and mostly boring.
Golf historians were quick to weigh in. “Dorf was never really ‘popular’ in the traditional sense,” said Dr. Onda Fairway, professor of Golf Media Studies at the University of Phoenix Online “He was more of a ‘your uncle had the tape so you saw it’ kind of thing. Back in the day when…how do I put this delicately?…Back when people weren’t such whiny little bitches about everything.”
Tim Conway, who passed away in 2019, could not be reached for comment due to the prior engagement of being dead. Though sources close to his estate confirmed he “would probably find this hilarious.”
Meanwhile, the PGA Tour has issued a long statement clarifying that Dorf was never an official ambassador for the sport, nor were his golf tips ever considered legal under USGA rules.
“We respect the right of younger generations to critique outdated media,” the statement read, “and we’d also like to thank them for reminding us about Dorf, we’d completely forgotten about that little guy. Remember when he was practicing chipping inside his house and ripped up the carpet? Comedy gold.” The statement continued to just poorly recall Dorf bits for several pages.Currently the cancellation effort has resulted in zero consequences, three sales of the Dorf’s Golf Bible VHS on eBay, and one confused Boomer who accidentally fell for another Amazon scam while trying to defend Dorf on Facebook.
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