Sudden British accent suggests mate has just binged a lot of Rick Shiels

SEPPO VALLEY – USA – Rolling up to the course just minutes before tee time as usual, lifelong Californian Austin Washington-Gunfire Jr. greeted his playing partners with “Alright lads? What’s the good word?” much to the confusion of his playing partners.

Stepping up to the first tee Austin stated “Beautiful day, innit? Sunny and 26 degrees, right mint. Not many like this back in the merrie old ay-ay?”

It was at this point the group realised that Austin had most likely consumed a solid 72 hours or Rick Shiels, and possibly a few ForeBrothers videos, on YouTube in preparation for today’s round.

Much alike the “Peppa Pig Effect” in which American children were reported speaking in British accents after prolonged exposure to the English cartoon, Rick Shiels evidently appears to have the same impact on brains that are extremely malleable (such as children) or of extremely low intellect (such as the average American).

“Right, just gunna pull out mah new Wilsun Staarrff Drivaarrh and try to put this one 250 metres right down the Cat & Fiddle”, said Austin to nobody in particular before slicing his drive out of bounds. “Bollocks!” Austin exclaimed to his group members who had already grown very tired of this.

The rest of the agonising round for the group consisted of more metric system madness, arduous rhyming-slang madness, and for some reason several references to the band Madness.

At one point between the 14th “Ruptured Spleen” (green) and 15th “Shakespeare Play” (fairway), Austin just promoted an upcoming episode of the Rick Shiels podcast verbatim before proclaiming his passionate fandom for North-East Brunderlandhamshire-West Football Club, despite never watching a soccer game in his life.

After finally sinking a triple bogey putt on the 18th, Austin asked if anyone wanted to grab a cheeky pint of Carlin’ at the Rub-a-Dub. They did not, mainly because they had no idea what the question actually was.